Board Shorts that Fit
I’m proud of myself this year, peeps. See, I have a problem dressing myself in a weather-appropriate manner sometimes.
I can’t believe I’m telling you all this.
Last time I went to Pride, I wore a polo shirt with a rainbow on it. And jeans. It was like 100 degrees out. I nearly died.
Luckily, I did not die. Even more luckily, between that year and this, I discovered HauteButch – and their selection of board shorts.
So this year when I went to Pride and it was mid-90s, I was fine, because I was in a tee and the board shorts you see over there in the picture on the right.
I try to be completely honest and open with you all, so let me tell you something else, since we’re on the subject. I didn’t like the board shorts when they arrived.
Wait, what?
Yeah, they fit weird. I’m used to women’s clothes or men’s clothes, right? Women’s clothes that highlight the curves, accentuate the femininity of the body and all that. You know what I’m talking about. Ugh.
And last time I tried to buy men’s board shorts, I couldn’t find any that fit at all. I either couldn’t get them over my…ahem… ample backside, or else they went down to my ankles. It was bad. Really bad.
I decided I was just out of luck, right? But then HauteButch happened.
When the HauteButch board shorts arrived, I was pumped at the brightness of the fabric, the quality of the material, and the overall look. But then I put them on.
Hmm. They fit around my waist and they hit above the knee right where I wanted them to. The shorts were roomy. They had deep pockets. The string tightened them up perfectly.
This can’t be right, I thought as I shuffled around trying them out. These aren’t right. They fit weird.
Uh, yeah, they fit weird. Because they actually fit the way I wanted them to and I wasn’t used to it. Guess what? I got used to it real quick.
I wore them out kayaking. They got soaked but dried almost immediately in the sun. Washed them. No fading, no bleeding, no shrinkage. Looked just like they did when I took them out of the package.
SO they passed the practical test. What about the fashion test?
As I said above, I wore them to Pride. I got a lot of compliments and felt good in them. And they even matched the purse I held for a friend.
Okay, they didn’t. But hey. Purse matching is definitely not a requirement for anything I wear, ever.
I plan to order more - maybe even one pair for every day of the week. I mean hey, it’s hot out! Dressing for the weather is now something I can do, and look good doing it.
Happy day.
I can’t believe I’m telling you all this.
Last time I went to Pride, I wore a polo shirt with a rainbow on it. And jeans. It was like 100 degrees out. I nearly died.
Luckily, I did not die. Even more luckily, between that year and this, I discovered HauteButch – and their selection of board shorts.
So this year when I went to Pride and it was mid-90s, I was fine, because I was in a tee and the board shorts you see over there in the picture on the right.
I try to be completely honest and open with you all, so let me tell you something else, since we’re on the subject. I didn’t like the board shorts when they arrived.
Wait, what?
Yeah, they fit weird. I’m used to women’s clothes or men’s clothes, right? Women’s clothes that highlight the curves, accentuate the femininity of the body and all that. You know what I’m talking about. Ugh.
And last time I tried to buy men’s board shorts, I couldn’t find any that fit at all. I either couldn’t get them over my…ahem… ample backside, or else they went down to my ankles. It was bad. Really bad.
I decided I was just out of luck, right? But then HauteButch happened.
When the HauteButch board shorts arrived, I was pumped at the brightness of the fabric, the quality of the material, and the overall look. But then I put them on.
Hmm. They fit around my waist and they hit above the knee right where I wanted them to. The shorts were roomy. They had deep pockets. The string tightened them up perfectly.
This can’t be right, I thought as I shuffled around trying them out. These aren’t right. They fit weird.
Uh, yeah, they fit weird. Because they actually fit the way I wanted them to and I wasn’t used to it. Guess what? I got used to it real quick.
I wore them out kayaking. They got soaked but dried almost immediately in the sun. Washed them. No fading, no bleeding, no shrinkage. Looked just like they did when I took them out of the package.
SO they passed the practical test. What about the fashion test?
As I said above, I wore them to Pride. I got a lot of compliments and felt good in them. And they even matched the purse I held for a friend.
Okay, they didn’t. But hey. Purse matching is definitely not a requirement for anything I wear, ever.
I plan to order more - maybe even one pair for every day of the week. I mean hey, it’s hot out! Dressing for the weather is now something I can do, and look good doing it.
Happy day.